Sermon Notes

Introduction

One of the most popular and intriguing three-letter words in the world today is “sex.” However, for many, sexual intimacy is considered a taboo subject, particularly within the church. Discussions about sex and relationships are rarely held in church, largely due to the private nature of the topic, which can make conversations about it feel uncomfortable.

Nevertheless, The Bible, the inspired (God breathed) word of God, addresses the subject of sex and relationships. There is a plethora of references to sexual intimacy throughout the Old and New Testaments.

Additionally, a whole book that is often overlooked—Song of Solomon—focuses on the intimacy between a husband and a wife whilst also illustrating God’s love for His people.

The world is not silent concerning Sex & Relationships

“The Church has to realise that if we’re not educating teenagers and young adults on Godly principles about sex, then someone somewhere is educating them about sex. And, more than likely, God has nothing to do with their teaching”

– Urban Faith

The Situation –
It’s time to break the ice – Song of Songs 7:10-13

I belong to my beloved, and his desire is for me. Come, my beloved, let us go to the countryside, let us spend the night in the villages.

Song of Songs 7:10-11

Cross References: Gen 1:28, Gen 4:1, Gen 2:18, 23-24, Matt 19:4-6

S……….in and of itself is not…E…………, it’s a G……….G…………G……….to humanity.

• Sex is a natural part of life, and it doesn’t have to be considered a taboo topic.

• The bride’s plea for her husband was both passionate and sincere.

• The desire for relationships is an inherent aspect of our human nature.

• However, this does not imply that everyone will seek a romantic relationship or marriage.

• Healthy and meaningful relationships can also be platonic. (The friend zone) (See 1 Cor 7:8-9)

Challenge – Do we have a healthy perspective on sexual intimacy and relationships as Christians? It’s important to remember that we should not view sexual intimacy as something evil or shameful. God has given us the gift of sexual intimacy for our good, not for evil.

The Problem –
Doing Things Our Way – Mark 10:6-12 & 1 Thess 4:3-8

That each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is Holy and honourable, not in passionate lust like the pagans who do not know God.

– 1 Thess 4:4-5

• In Mark’s Gospel, Jesus addressed the lifestyle and practices of the Jews who questioned him about marriage and divorce.

• He encouraged the Pharisees to return to God’s original design for relationships, as outlined in the beginning of creation (see Mark 10:39).

• Additionally, Paul emphasizes the importance of avoiding the sexual practices that align with worldly standards and stresses the need for self-control to resist the passionate lusts of human nature. (See 1 Thess 4:4-5)

Challenge – While we acknowledge that sex and relationships are fundamentally good and God-given, it’s important to recognise that, like many other gifts, they can be distorted, corrupted, and misused.

As believers, we need to understand that God has established healthy boundaries in His Word. Therefore, it is essential to study these guidelines and distinguish between what is permissible in the world and what aligns with God’s teachings in the Bible.

The Solution –
Enjoy Sex and Relationships God’s Way – Proverbs 5:15-18 & Song of Songs 7:10-13

Drink water from your own cistern, 
and running water from your own well.

Why should your springs flow in the streets, 
your streams of water in the public squares?

Let them be yours alone, 
never to be shared with strangers.

May your fountain be blessed, 
and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth: – Proverbs 5:15-18

Cross references: Song of Songs 7:10-13, Proverbs 5:15-18, 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5, Hebrews 13:4, John 14:15

• The wife’s appeal for her husband in Song of Songs chapter seven correlates with Solomon’s encouragement to men in Proverbs chapter five.

• God wants us to enjoy sex and relationships in the safety and blessing of his boundaries

• God wants us to enjoy relationships that are fruitful and honouring to God

Challenge – Being a Christian doesn’t mean that we cannot have fun or enjoy sexual intimacy with our spouses. However, it does require us to stay within the guidelines that God has outlined for us in His Word.

Discussion Questions

1. During the introductory remarks of the sermon, we were encouraged to break the ice when discussing sex and relationships in church. Why do you think sex and relationships are rarely discussed or preached about in churches today?

2. The point made was that if the church remains silent on the topic of sex and relationships, the world will become the dominant voice in educating young people and young adults. What are some challenges posed by current world and societal views on sex and relationships today?

3. Referencing 1 Thessalonians 4:3, what are some examples of sexual immorality found in God’s Word, and how do they contrast with what is considered acceptable in the world today?

4. In Proverbs 5, can you think of any examples where the media or popular culture glamorizes behaviours similar to those of the adulterous woman or man? How can we counteract these influences?

5. Looking at the Song of Songs, Chapter 7, how does the imagery used in this chapter contribute to the themes of love and desire?